American night sex

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When I have sex I can forget all that control and be something different, unembarrassed and lustful, like an animal, but also absolutely human in a dark and disgusting way. Sex is the place we can find one another again. We spilled out of the house Jimmy, Dolly and I had been living in when I met Pete, into the countryside, where there was space for us all. Sex necessarily involves shutting them out of my mind and my space. And I was the parent the children turned to for help, since I was always there. They had small children, but whenever I passed them on the dirt track that led to their cabin, Janey would be sitting right next to Powder on the bench seat in the front of his pickup. That we have not lost each other.

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